Momo and Chen, both from Shenzhen, Guangdong Province in China, have been each other’s first love for two years. However, to others, they seem more like acquaintances than a couple. Living in different regions, they meet once or twice a week, and each pays for the expenses for their dates. Additionally, they consider affectionate conversations via messenger disgusting, so their exchanges remain dry. They are neither overly excited about their relationship nor do they often argue. Momo enjoys being with Chen but also values her independence and freedom.
According to the South China Morning Post (SCMP) on the 28th (local time), such relationships are trending in China. In these relationships, termed single love, individuals prioritize their feelings over sacrifices for each other.
These single lovers disdain those overwhelmed by love, referred to as love brains. Momo told the SCMP, “People who believe in staying together until death are fools.”
Another romantic trend among young Chinese people is a practice called Suicidal Singleness. It refers to those who stay alone rather than date, even when they develop romantic feelings for someone. The SCMP analyzed these suicidal singles as people who might seem like singletons at first glance but could be those who harbor deep desires for romantic love more than anyone else. “They imagine countless romantic scenarios, including falling in love, but only think about it without making any effort to make it a reality,” the SCMP reported.
One interviewee supporting such a dating style told the SCMP, “What could be more fun than playing with a cellphone?” They added that it’s not the right approach if they must work hard to find or maintain a relationship. The SCMP also noted that the increase in single love and suicidal singleness is helping to explain the 239 million-strong single population recorded in China as of 2021.
Experts view this trend of young people giving up on dating due to the excessive competition in modern society and the resulting burnout. Also, the perception that mental and financial independence is more important than wasting time on emotional issues influences this trend. The psychological website Jiandanxinli stated, “Young people feel their desire for relationships has been exhausted due to work stress. If they fail in love, they fear it might harm their mental health, hence they prefer to stay in a comfortable and familiar zone of not dating.”
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