When a child doesn’t get their way, it can lead to dramatic scenes: rolling on the floor, screaming, crying, or even throwing objects in frustration. As parents, knowing how to handle these moments with care is essential.
Toddler tantrums are common during development, typically occurring between ages 18 months and 4 years. These emotional outbursts arise when a child feels frustrated by external limits that hinder their desires.
During a tantrum, a child might roll on the floor, scream, throw, or kick in a burst of emotion. The length of these episodes can vary based on the child’s personality and the situation, with severe cases sometimes leading to breath-holding.
Shin Ji Yoon from Uijeongbu Eulji University Hospital’s Department of Psychiatry shares seven effective strategies for managing these challenging episodes.
1. Acknowledge Their Emotions
It’s essential to validate how your child feels. Simple phrases like, “You must be really upset; I see you’re not feeling good,” can help them feel understood and supported.
2. Provide a Sense of Security
Keep eye contact, speak softly, and offer a comforting hug. This reassurance helps your child feel secure during their emotional storm.
3. Stay Calm and Rational
Instead of reacting with anger, model calmness. Teach your child to communicate their feelings rationally by demonstrating it yourself.
4. Establish Clear Rules and Routines
Set clear expectations and create a predictable routine to prevent tantrums. Giving your child a heads-up about changes can make transitions smoother.
5. Redirect Their Attention
Offer alternatives to shift their focus during a tantrum. Suggest a favorite toy or engage them in fun activities like drawing or dancing to help them cope.
6. Teach Self-Regulation
Encourage self-regulation skills by guiding your child to take deep breaths or count to calm down. These techniques empower them to manage their emotions and make rational choices.
7. Address Inappropriate Behavior Firmly
While it’s instant to validate their feelings, don’t shy away from setting boundaries. Be cautious, as this may escalate their frustration.
If tantrums persist beyond the age of 3 or 4, or if they last longer than 15 minutes and occur multiple times a day, it’s essential to consult a professional for guidance on addressing the issue.
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